Super Smash Bros. Brawl 0
Our review of the Nintendo fanboy’s latest wet dream!
 By Dustin Pena |
II spent a wonderful Saturday in Hollywood waiting in line, miles away from any hint of a woman, for the midnight release of my most anticipated game of 2008, Super Smash Brothers Brawl for the Nintendo Wii. |
Magically I was the first lucky gamer to purchase the game at the stroke of midnight and as I made my way out of the store I was met by a round of applause from my fellow line goers. I felt just like Cinderella, only sexier.
The first thing I did when I got home was attempt to lay a smash down on the world by throwing my mitts around over the Nintendo Wi-Fi connection. I waited longer to get a match than I did in line to buy the game! What?! Nintendo knew this was gonna be a huge selling point for the game so why were the servers taking a leave of absence? Simply Amazing. In fact it wasn’t until my buddy and I traded our very personal Friend Codes that I was able to quickly connect and hand him his ass on a turtle shell. Once I started wailing on him and mouthing off with my personalized taunts like “Kiss my brown” I saw a little light at the end of a very long, long tunnel.
Mario takes a break from the action to help a Pikachu cross the street.
After we disconnected I decided to do what I do best, play with myself. I quickly pummeled through Classic Mode with my favorite newcomer, Pit from the Kid Icarus series, made popular on the NES and Gameboy. The game has a hefty roster of new challengers to get acclimated to, but I only found a select few (hint: they all have wings) suitable to my fighting style. The rest were mostly throw aways as far as I’m concerned, but I’m sure that somewhere out there, someone is an Olimar loyalist. Right? Maybe? I just keep telling myself that and I’m sure Nintendo does too. The biggest change in the series is the inclusion of non-Nintendo characters for the first time but you’ll have to earn ‘em
