Mongo Nation

Better start sending out those Christmas wish lists…

By Jeremy Azevedo

The gaming industry is throwing everything they’ve got at us this holiday season, with so many good games on the way that most gamers may never get a chance to play them all. (Not that this will stop me from at least trying…)

Hopefully this won’t cause the more “indie” titles to be completely lost in the shuffle, but then, any indie publisher willing to go head to head with Gears of War 2 and Resistance 2 probably deserves whatever they get, amitire? Oh, and For you Wii owners out there, I hope you’re having fun with Wii Music because there isn’t much of anything else coming out anytime soon. Big surprise, eh?

Gears of War 2

System: Xbox 360
Release date: 11/07

Fans of the original smash-hit shooter will be pleased to find more of the same, albeit with bigger bosses, slightly tighter controls and visuals, and a much improved online multiplayer mode. The story is still set firmly in the Michael Bay mold of big explosions and dialogue spoken in grunts, but when the game looks and plays this good, who cares? If you live in Australia, Germany or Japan, don’t hold your breath for this one, as GOW2 promises to be incredibly violent and will almost certainly be banned there.

Tomb Raider: Underworld

System: Mutli-Platform
Release date: 11/18

Lara Croft may have finally achieved a complete 360 from awesome to unacceptable, then back to awesome again. Gone are all the sluggish mechanics and lame combat of previous titles, replaced instead with more of the exploration and sense of discovery that made the original so memorable. Well, that and the tiny, cleavage-baring costumes. Expect more God of War-style set pieces and more of an emphasis on actually raiding tombs in this sequel. Read the rest of this entry →

An awesome remake appears!

By Jeremy Azevedo

Square-Enix’s Dragon Quest series has really never been known as a cutting edge, risk-taking franchise. That’s why it comes as such a surprise that Dragon Quest IV, a remake of an almost 20 year-old game, comes off as such a fresh approach to the traditional RPG.

The most fascinating thing about Chapters of the Chosen is that the main quest doesn’t really even begin for several hours. Instead, you play through four short, individual quests, each starring one of the key party members that will eventually accompany your hero in his adventure. This is an incredibly effective way of making you care about the characters when they join your party again later in the game. Instead of being strangers that support your hero, they are co-stars in the story of Dragon Quest IV.

Despite the unique approach to storytelling, not mush else about DQIV is terribly modern. The combat and exploration is as traditional as it gets, although some characters (the merchant Torneko in particular) do have some very interesting and unpredictable abilities. Sqauae-Enix opted not to do a full graphical update like they did with Final Fantasy IV earlier in the year, instead choosing to stick with old-school 2-D sprites set against a partly 3-D background (which also does a great job of incorporating both screens). If you’ve ever played a Dragon Warrrior game before, though, you would probably agree that this was a good choice. This series has always been known for it’s colorful and memorable character and enemy designs, and this game certainly lives up to that reputation. Read the rest of this entry →

Worth saving?

By Jeremy Azevedo

Most of the complaints that I hear to do with Konami’s “Lost in Blue” series in general have to do with the amount of maintenance that goes into just keeping your characters alive, and how it puts a damper on exploration. These are perhaps people that don’t know how to get out of action game-mode and relax a little.

Lost in Blue: Shipwrecked does have it’s share of faults. The graphics are a little underwhelming. As with most games on the Wii, I’d really rather see 2-D or cel-shaded graphics, as 3-D models just tend to look a little janky on the system regardless of what game it is. And it’s a little weird how the characters inexplicably belt out one in ten lines of dialogue. What’s the point? I don’t understand why all of the dialogue isn’t spoken at this point. And of course, the most glaring problem is the fact that, right from the outset, your characters are constantly starving to death. Which does, indeed, inhibit exploration. Seriously, you have to eat like fifty coconuts a day just to stay alive. It’s retarded.

They look skinny, but apparently host stomach parasites with the appetite of ten fat guys.

Here’s the thing, though: Lost in Blue is not meant to be rushed through. That you characters require constant maintenance should tell you that the way to get ahead is not to rush blindly into action with empty pockets, but to take your time and prepare. If you imagine what it would be like to be stranded on a desert island, it probably wouldn’t be all about fighting wild boars with your bare hands and swinging from vines like Tarzan, but rather, taking the time to build up your supplies and ensure your continuing survival. Cute as it seems, Lost in Blue is almost sim-like in the way it embraces this idea.

The proper way to enjoy Lost in Blue: Shipwrecked is at a leisurely pace. Before going out to explore the island, you really have to take a day to gather supplies, pack a few lunches, make sure your tools are in order and that you have a back up supply of water. It’s not exactly an action packed experience, but it is relaxing and most of the mini-games are actually pretty fun and make good (but not obtrusive) use of the wiimote. You’d be surprised how much further you get with a little pre-prep, even while dragging your dead-weight partner around with you. Really, that broad isn’t good for anything more than an extra inventory bag.

The rare and mysterious singing/clapping jungle pandas.

Protip: Early in the game, you will have a strong urge to punch this game in the face. This is because you need like 100 vines in order to progress and there don’t appear to be any around. This will feel very much like bullcrap to you, but I will save you an aneurysm and tell you what to do. After you fight the boar, you will be able to push a rock. You have to have Lucy with you (but then you sorta always have to bring her with so that almost goes without saying). A little further ahead, you will find a cooking utensil. It’s in a craggy area near where you find some crystals, and you can even make a shortcut back to basecamp near here. On the way back, you will be attacked by an ox, which triggers a minigame. After completing this, you will be able to access a forest with all the vines you need! As long as you always keep a stock of ready made lunches and firewood on hand, the game is a lot easier from this point on.

Rating: 7 out of 10
+1 if your favorite TV show is Lost
-2 if the you loved Devil May Cry but hated The Sims

Feminism? In my video game tapes?

More often than not, female protagonists in video games tend to exist as little more than a shameless attempt to rope in young male audiences looking for cheap thrills (Much like the banner image I used above for this article).But what about those female heroines that transcend the basic law of jiggly tits=$$$? No really, I’m being serious… I’ve even gone so far as to compile a list of the top 10 gaming heroines that are more famous for their contribution to the artform than they are for their propensity for up-skirt cinematography.

Ms. Pac-Man (Ms. Pac-Man)

You may have thought that Ms. Pac-Man was nothing more than regular Pac-Man with a bow on his head meant to rope female gamers into playing arcade games, but you would be very wrong sir (or madam). Whatever Pac-Man could do, Ms. Pac-Man could do faster and better. Most old school arcade enthusiasts will tell you that Ms. Pac-Man is just quite simply a smoother and more enjoyable experience than her male predecessor.

Jade (Beyond Good And Evil)

Not many video games star a female journalist struggling to uncover a worldwide military conspiracy using stealth and photography. Jade is probably the best example of a female protagonist being treated with the same respect as a male lead, in one of the best and most under-rated games of all time. Her uncle is a humanoid pig, which is kind of a turnoff, but they’re technically not blood relatives so at least there probably wasn’t any pig-lovin’ in her direct line of lineage. Read the rest of this entry →

Cutting edge or edge of your patience?

By Jeremy Azevedo

One thing that I dislike about racing games is that they tend to always be about “underground” street racing or high-performance track racing.

Not since Midway’s “Super Off Road” have I played a really decent dirt track racer. I’m sure that there have been many, but Baja: Edge of Control is the first I’ve played in quite some time that wasn’t a bare-bones arcade-y affair or an overly technical simulation.

Baja: EOC starts out a little mixed… The difficulty seems incredibly unreasonable at first, and there is no information given about the various cars that you have to choose from other than what they are called and what paint jobs are available. There isn’t really anything resembling a tutorial, and even on the easiest setting the other cars on the track blow you away by a wide margin. Even after upgrading my car to it’s maximum potential, I still struggled to place in the early races. And then something just clicked. Once I got the hang of managing my speed around turns, popping the clutch for an acceleration boost after a powerslide and pre-loading my shocks before a jump, it was a whole new game. What I’m saying is that the learning curve is a real motherf**ker. Read the rest of this entry →

Capcom’s retro fan service is awesome!

By Jeremy Azevedo

If you would’ve told me a year ago that I’d be playing a new classic 8-bit NES Mega Man game on my Wii today, I’d tell you that was crazy talk, and that you’ve been spending too much time with disgraced series villain, “Crystal Man”.

Apparently, someone over at Capcom listens to crazy talk and put together another great piece of fan service on the heels of last months “Bionic Commando” remake. Mega Man 9 looks, sounds and plays just like old-school Mega Man, before all the graphical changes and charge busters and secret characters and other bullcrap that would eventually obscure the series’ greatness. In true retro fashion, you must battle 8 renegade robots with specific strengths and weaknesses, take their weapons, and eventually take the battle to Dr. Wiley who is almost certainly behind it all!

Mega Man and Splash Woman, the first ever female evil robot master.

The first thing you notice, besides the colorful, charmingly familiar 80s style graphics, is the incredibly awesome music. Classic Mega Man games were known for their rocking midi-based music and steep challenge, and this one is no different. You will probably find yourself surprisingly slow at first when it comes to twitch action and platforming, something that has been absent from most modern games.

Another thing that the original Mega Man games were known for was the great characters and weapons. This roster, which includes Concrete, Jewel, Plug, Hornet, Magma and Galaxy Man, also includes the first female robot master, Splash Woman. Because the mega slide and charge buster have been removed, the earlier games reliance on utilizing the robot master’s weapons has returned, which makes the game quite a bit more strategic.

The fruitiest Mega Man screen-shot of all time.

Even if you are not old enough to have enjoyed these games back in the day, you should really experience what essentially feels like a lost classic from another era. There is even an option that simulates old-fashion slowdown and screen flicker! If this is the kind of thing that we can expect from publishers as a result of digital distribution, then we are certainly in for some wonderful surprises in the coming years.

Mega Man 9 is available now for the Wii, September 25th for PSN and October 1st for XBLA for about $10 on all platforms!

Could Rambo and the Karate Kid be far behind?

By Jeremy Azevedo

When I was a little boy, I would drop whatever I was doing and dance along whenever I heard the “Ghostbusters” theme song…

Seeing these pictures from the new Ghostbusters game takes me back to those times. In what is essentially the official sequel to the first two films, all of the original Ghostbusters will be making their return in Ghostbusters: The Game. We’re talking about Bill Murray, Dan Akroyd, Harold Ramis, Ernie Hudson and all of the major supporting characters (save for Rick Moranis, who has yet to recover from the tragic loss of his testicles as a reult of one too many “Honey I Shrunk the Kids” movies).

Written by Ramis and Akroyd themselves, the new game puts you in the shoes of a rookie experimental equipment technician (guinea pig) joining the Ghostbusters to combat the latest supernatural threat to New York City. The following images are from the Xbox 360/PS3 version of the game, which is vastly superior to the Wii version in terms of visuals. But I wouldn’t discredit the cool factor that is bound to result from using your Wiimote as a proton blaster, which is exactly the kind of thing that the Wii was designed for!

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New characters! Never-before-seen pics!

By Jeremy Azevedo

It’s hard not to be excited about all things Batman with the Dark Knight coming out this weekend. Well Here’s something else to get excited about: We played Lego Batman at the E3 and it was rad!

Check out these new pics from Lego batman, showing off a number of new playable characters. More to come as additional characters are revealed!

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Now with 40% more exploding barrels!

By Jeremy Azevedo

There’s a lot to like about modern video games… The graphics look better, the music sound better, the stories are deeper, and the gameplay is more advanced without being too complicated. But there’s also a lot to hate!

No matter how much time passes, no matter how much people complain, the same old lazy game design clichés persist like crabs in a cathouse. Following is a list of the top 10 most intolerable design elements still in use today…

Unskippable Tutorials/Cutscenes

And so on and so forth…

Goddamnit, the game already comes with a manual, right? If I wanted to know how to play the game, I’d read that and be done with it. Don’t make me sit through a tutorial before I can play the game, especially if it’s cleverly disguised as “gameplay”. The same goes for cut scenes: If I wanted to watch a movie, I’d do that. I’m all for story development and everything, but if it comes at a cost of gameplay, if it’s unskippable (especially on subsequent playthroughs) or if it’s overlong, then I can do without. Metal Gear series, I’m looking squarely at you on this one! Shut your goddamn pie-hole and let me shoot some terrorists or robots or whatever the f**k already!

Locked Doors

Wow. Really?

So let me get this straight: I am a badass 6’4 spec-ops mercenary packing a bazooka, a cyborg exo-skeleton and a machine gun with a chainsaw attached to it, but I can’t kick open a locked door? Seriously? This is especially retarded in games with vehicles, which you always magically have the keys to regardless of said vehicle’s origin, or in Resident Evil games, where the key is always some piece of shit stone idol or jewel or something. If I have a lightsaber or a grenade launcher in my hand, no locked door is going to stop me, so please, for the love of god, think of a better way to impede my progress than making me look for another lousy color coded key card.

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Guitar Hero is the new Rock Band?

By Jeremy Azevedo

In an obvious bid to silence those that would accuse Activision of resting on it’s laurels while Rock Band evolves the music game genre far beyond the scope of Guitar Hero, The developer has made a shocking announcement in this month’s issue of Game Informer.

Apparently, the next installment of Guitar Hero will not only feature the addition of drums and vocals, but will also feature a six piece drum kit and a new guitar peripheral with an as-yet-unannounced new feature. No word yet on whether or not these new instruments will be compatible with Rock Band or vice-versa. But judging by the fact that the Rock Band drum kit is only a four piece, I’d say the chances are slim. I’d also say that both Activision and Harmonix are getting just a little bit carried away with all the goddamn controllers. How many more do they really expect consumers to buy?

Additionally, Guitar Hero 4 will allow greater customization of band members, logos, and instruments in-game. Of course, due to legal entanglements with former sponsor, Gibson, this may not include actual real-world instrument models. The really big news, though, is that this installment will raise the stakes one step further by allowing users to actually record their own music. That’s right, honest to goodness digital video game bands will soon be peddling their wares on MySpace. Obviously, Playstation 2 Guitar Heroes can suck it when it comes to actually uploading their custom creation on the web.

The only bands that have even a tentative confirmation for the game are Van Halen, The Eagles Linkin Park, Sublime and contest winners The Answer. No idea what songs will be featured yet, so don’t ask. You’re welcome to guess though!